Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Children humor for grownups

Do we find many women & men who have the frankness, innocence and honesty that children have? It’s not the kind of humor where one slips on a banana and people laugh, it’s not the humor where people laugh at themselves (Now it’s become a fad, that if one can joke on oneself, they have sense of humor) In public schools today, the teacher is afraid of the principal; the principals are afraid of superintendents; the superintendents are afraid of the school board; the board is afraid of the parents; the parents are afraid of the children; and the children are afraid of nobody! On one hand we find children with utmost naiveté and on other we find them with the brutal slapstick repartee. Sometimes children just say something and that makes a good joke and many other times they come up with simple, honest answers that tickle your funny bone. So read on some short ones on children and see where your childhood is! The math teacher had written a number with a decimal point on the blackboard and to show the effect of multiplying by ten, had rubbed out the decimal point. “Now, Sameer where is the decimal point?” “On the duster miss!” “Good gracious!” Shouted the teacher. “I ask you a simple question! What’s a fortification? And nobody knows…this is real bad. I want you boys to try” all the boys sat mum. The teacher became angry and pointing towards a boy said. Tell me will you what’s fortification? The boy slowly got up and said “twice twentification sir” The teacher was trying to popularize arithmetic by bringing home the examples to the students. “Now, if you had five rupees in one pocket and ten rupees in the other, what would you say you had?” “The wrong pants” replied the boy. Teacher: Give an example of hypocrite Student: A boy who goes to school with a smile on his face. Mom: Am I crazy if I talk to myself? Girl: No but you are when you listen. A ten year old boy was asked to spell the word straight. He spelt correctly. Then his teacher asked: “what does it mean?” The kid replied “without soda and water” The little boy got separated from his father in a crowd and told a policeman he was lost. The policeman asked: “What’s your father like?” “Wine and women” replied the kid. The younger kid returned home from school one day and said that he had fallen down during recess and grazed his knees and elbow. “Didn’t you cry?” questioned the mom. “No” he replied bravely “The bell rang and there was no time” Schoolboy’s left arm was badly inured and he went to doctor and asked him to bandage the right arm. Doctor: Bandage the right arm? Why?? Boy: You don’t know school children they will attack the bandaged arm. Grandpa: who is the most popular girl in your school? Girl: last term it was Eliza as she gave us all measles. The scene in the movie was tensed and audiences were enthralled. Suddenly the hero slaps the heroine followed by dead silence. A young voice in the hall: Why doesn’t she hit back like you do Mommy?” “What happened why are you crying?” A mother asked the little son. In between the sobs he replied: “Daddy was driving a nail in the wall and he hit his thumb with hammer” “That’s nothing to cry about you silly. Why didn’t you laugh?” “I did” the boy replied. “Come out and play” “No I can’t” “Why?” “If I don’t watch dad, he won’t complete my homework”